Corrosive Shame

In response to some of the discussions following Odyssey, which wasn't my favourite event ever but I'm getting over that now.

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My name is Simon, and I am a nerd.

When I was at school I was overly intellectual - I wore glasses, I did well in exams and I hated sport. I remember vividly enjoying cricket because I could sit and read a book in the outfield, and when playing rugby was never quite fast enough to catch the person I was chasing and have to tackle them into the mud.

Formative experiences like these stay with you for years, so when designing Odyssey one of the early decisions was to look, wherever possible, for areas of the game where the 'fat kid' (as I referred to myself from those memories) wasn't left out. The most obvious examples of this are the arena and quests. In both these cases more champions are useful - it's not about choosing between one champion or another, or picking the best team - everyone gets a fight or a quest so the more 'fat kids' you involve the better it is for your nation.

This means that inclusion is built in from the foundations. It's about producing a game where people are encouraged to bring their friends and make them feel welcome, where the social side of the game sits alongside combat, puzzles, gods and politics.

Inclusion means characters and players. Character inclusion is more straightforward - they are created to serve a purpose and the choices in character creation are clear signals to the game organisers and other players where the players would like to spend their time. Inclusion of players can be more complicated. Superficially it is simple - events are public access and as such anyone can attend; but my problems start when one player's behaviour makes another feel excluded. This might be because they are fat or thin, bald or hirsute, straight or gay, male or female, tall or short - all manner of reasons. But whatever the issue about the player that can be mocked - and whether it is meant in jest or all seriousness, this kind of behaviour is unacceptable in our game.

There are plenty of ways to insult peoples characters rather than their players; to enjoy roleplaying without it being offensive roleplaying; to keep it fun.

We tried to build a game where everyone who wanted to be in could be, whether they were the lead batsman or the outfield bookworm, so behaviour that makes any player feel otherwise is not welcome.

Of all the things I've done in the last couple of weeks one thing I've not done is update LJ. This isn't really the slow yet inevitable parting of intimate friends, if not lovers; rather it's a reflection of how I'm having enough trouble reading that I'm not writing.

So what this means for you is that you'll continue to get major spamblasts of everything I can remember approximately once every two weeks. At least for now...

Looking back it's not actually been as long as I'd thought since I updated, despite the last one being rather self-indulgent and not at all interesting. Two weekends have (to be honest) passed since a proper update. I've downloaded a lot of Movies and TV, I've been to the cinema, I've played some LRP and I've had one of my eyes turn from white to red. And not this time in the name of anyone's grand design.

Movies wise, my crib sheet tells me I've watched the following:( Read more... )

Then, in the middle of it all, there was LRP. Maelstrom was good. At least, in the sense that the event went well, the people were pretty much without exception lovely. I could gush further but then the accusations of bodysnatching would start afresh. There are some photos - I really will do a photo post soon. They're not particularly impressive but are focussed on "giving people what they want" as much as "taking the shots I want".

And then finally there is work. It's not bad. Progress is being made. But it's slow. And I'm getting distracted. But I expect renewed vigour and desires to make things happen next week. I just have to survive the weekend first.

I'm sure I had something more interesting to say. Perhaps I did two hours ago when I started writing this. Maybe it was eulogising over Lightroom. Maybe it was enthusing about more LRP to come. Maybe it was about skiing. Maybe I just want to go to bed...

It's classic rawk hour on Kerrang - I only turned it on to catch up with what the kids are listening to these days and get subjected to Def Leppard and antique Chilli Peppers.

Anyway, an action packed weekend has been mostly survived and without a huge backlog, but as I've done plenty of things since I last properly updated I should probably get on with it in order to appear interesting and most importantly whore for comments. Maybe pax_draconis is right that "Hurst Street couldn't cope with my sarcasm" - hang on, it was something else about being down.

Last week was a lifetime ago. The only things I can really remember now is rejoicing in my own clumsiness and watching Mirrormask. The latter was quite enjoyable. The former offered less immediate gratification so but probably better for my immortal soul.

Friday was Scarlet at HQ. I've thought, even if I haven't said before, how little time I have for dress-up clubs that claim to be fetish. I know by dictionary definitions they are technically correct, but so probably is the local meeting of the trainspotters. It was all a bit false, a bit mainstream and I had an unhappy argument that can't possibly be the cause for any of my negative feelings. While I'm talking about failures I'll go on about my photos from the night and how I remained terrible about asking people to let me shoot them and how dreadfully mediocre the results are. Still, the only way is up and all that, every cloud has a silver lining.

On Saturday I failed to do any work. Instead I processed the photos from the night before and failed to decide on a 20s outfit for the evening's burlesque. Apparently this might be the last but one (and the last I can make because of NWO) which is a shame as while the acts are generally a mixed bag (being polite) I'm all for people having a go. I ended up again in Edwards afterwards and danced to the same three electro songs they normally play and watched a video of Depeche Mode in 1993 looking far younger than the week before.

What was most interesting was the company of a nice young lady called Amber who had emailled me and said "Can I come and assist on one of your shoots?". Of course I agreed, but did warn her that as a photography graduate she knew more than I did. Still, she seemed to enjoy it well enough and ended up coming to Edwards with us. It was at that point I really started feeling sorry for her.

Then, on Sunday came the perfect way to end a mediocre weekend - Placebo. I know a few songs but I'm a long way from being a fan and to be honest they left me wanting my bed more than wanting an encore. I've seen a lot of bands and a lot of gigs (apparently I've photographed 179 unique bands over 197 total performances at 41 venues - not sure how many actual gigs that is - but you get the idea) and they were one of the least energetic, least engaged and laziest.

Fortunately the weekend was better as a total expereince than the sum of its parts.

Other than that - I've done some work, I've watched some Lost (which I'm still quite enjoying) and the finale of BSG:S2 which might have involved shark jumping a little too much. I'm kinda worried about S3 - but we shall see in good time no doubt. Lost is still excitingly going almost nowhere.

As part of my "reinvent self as 12-year old emo" I've started a MySpace. This is terribly exciting especially as it's apparently the forefront of the introduction of social networking and blogging to the unwashed UK tabloid masses..

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The Sun rises on myspace

The Sun tabloid of London plans to tie its website to myspace.com, hoping to capitalize on the popularity of the networking site with a "MySun" online readers' community. Readers will be able to create web pages and blogs and share video and photos using myspace.com software on a MySun portal. The (U.K.) Guardian quotes Sun and News Corp. owner Rupert Murdoch on the subject:

"This is a generation, now popularly referred to as the 'myspace generation', talking to itself in a world without frontiers," he said.

"It is just one example of how the media, with its ability to reach millions with information, entertainment and education can use the achievements of technology to create better and more interesting lives for a great many people.

"And it is one reason why I believe we are at the dawn of a golden age of information - an empire of new knowledge.

http://www.cyberjournalist.net/news/003387.php

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Terrifying eh.

And now, Patrick Stewart is advertising Argos.

Post about skiing soon. I was going to put it here but I suspect I've got under three readers left. Same goes for all the photos mentioned above.